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Top Ten Facebook Faux Pas

By Christopher Schonberger

After graduation, using Facebook is a whole new experience. When you haven’t seen people for over a calendar year, the impulse to know “what they’re up to” becomes increasingly odd. By the same token, it is easier for people to provide a misleading portrait of their new lives as the “checks and balances” of the college campus slip away. The mythical El Dorado of a perfect post-grad profile continues to elude me, but I do have some ideas about what it should not include…

1) Posting your own wedding pictures.

Similarly, don’t put “engaged” or “married” for relationship status. This type of thing really seems to freak people out. Wedding photos are probably best on ShutterFly…maybe Flickr at a stretch. Probably not on the Internet, to be fair. The problem is that deep down, Facebook still breeds the subconscious allure of juvenile behavior and “random play.” Life-long bonds of love throw people off and make them uncomfortable. It’s like those people who bring their children to bars. Get out of here!

2) Joining Facebook after graduating.

This is such a cry for help that it is actually disconcerting. Another related issue is late-blooming. We see this when a person displays a post-graduation surge in Facebook activity, furiously entering the public sphere under the guise of being an incredibly social and fun-loving person. This is evidenced by a multitude of tagged photos from various sources and excessive wall posting. Being a late-bloomer is a manipulation of the Facebook platform—it appears that a person partying so much in the post-college life, which is not so viable if you don’t do drugs. It is indicative of a person who has serious regrets and forgot to showcase her exceptional partying and socializing skills at the proper time.

3) Putting up an album for every weekend of the year.

Much like Real World cast members, some people go to the same bar every weekend and apparently have an awesome time. Because the rest of us are very bored and voyeuristic, we will be forced to click through all 47 pictures every Monday, even though they fill us with revulsion and acrimony.

4) Using the wall for private correspondence.

Since its inception, the wall has been the cause of many of Facebook’s most egregious faux pas. In post-grad life, walling what should be messaged remains an epidemic. Doing this is the online equivalent of shouting across the table. Even the notion of saying happy birthday publicly is self-congratulatory. It says, “Look at me everyone, I’m a good friend!” Use messages for private correspondences and use the wall the publicly roast people. Because that’s what it’s for!

5) Joining a disingenuous network.

Hanging out in New York a couple weekends a month does not make you eligible for the New York network. Nor does having a grandmother that lives in Santa Monica place you in the LA network. In many ways, joining a non-school affiliated network is useless enough as it is, but trying to fake the funk in a network that’s a stretch is just dishonest. A lie is a lie.

6) Posting uninteresting links.
With the advent of the news feed, Facebook users are able to push their agendas on you like never before. Posting an interesting link, or even a self-serving one, is not such a crime, but incessantly linking front page news is offensive. If you are trying to prove that you are informed, that is obnoxious. If you think your friends need you to keep them informed, that is obnoxious.

7) Posting Facebook videos.

This isn’t really a faux pas, but has anyone ever seen a good Facebook video? I reckon the answer is “no,” because they are all terrible. This is a bizarre phenomenon, and it just goes to prove that no one on YouTube is actually an amateur. What a sham!

8) Including your entire CV under “Work Info.”

This girl I know really seems to be annoyed at this, but since she only cites one example, I wonder if she may be persuing a personal vendetta. At any rate, I could see how it might get one’s goat, and it is a clear indicator of the transformation of Facebook from hilarious free-for-all to lame networking tool.

9) Updating your status incessantly.

Apparently, Facebook will soon drop the “is” from the status message feature, due in part to a petition on the site that garnered over 163,000 members. Who said our generation doesn’t care about anything? Good job guys, but unfortunately this won’t change the fact that status messages are either uninteresting, unfunny, or completely false.

10) Having too many applications.

There is no critical mass for Facebook applications, but if someone has to scroll past a visual zoo of absurd apps like “Daily Babe” and “Marry Me, Sex Me, or Kill Me” just to get to the normal wall, you should probably just move to MySpace. Adding loads of apps reveals a lack of restraint and often results in your friends getting all sorts of requests that they have no interest in.



Could we also get some regulations on appropriate status changes, assuming, of course, that these changes be made at acceptable intervals? For instance, I personally think certain things are better left out of the status update arena, like if you are buying a house or making some other big adult life change. I mean, really - if you are still using facebook as you're platform for validation at the same time as you are undertaking something as grown up as the purchase of a home, why not tell folks what you really should be doing, which is seeking help for your obvious struggle with life stage confusion.

The trivial crap people post only makes them appear to have no life whatsoever. "I just went shopping!" "I am home from work now" "Tomorrow I am going to clean the bathroom" People please. No! One! Cares! And for those of you who were fired or reprimanded because of inappropriate content....no sympathy for you here. It is a rule of thumb when using work email to not post anything you would not want your grandmother to read....same goes for Facebook. Get over yourselves. We went years and years and years not knowing your every waking movement. Do you think that now with FB you are suddenly exciting and earth shattering? If we are your friends we already love you. Chill with the postings so we do not begin to love you less.....!!

Whoever wrote this needs to realize that the typical facebook user hs changed. I my neck of the woods, it is my self, along with my old lady friends who use facebook to post photos of us with our grandkids, look at what our 30 something kids are doing, & playing all the fun games. Oh, & don't foget keeping track of our 90 year old aunti & uncles. Our pages are filled with zyanga apps & we love it!

I think you need to write a new list of paux pas.

The origianl "user" is no longer the "norm"...

Everyone is taking these social sites waaaaaaayyyyy tro serious. People join these sites bc they have FREEDOM to basically do and say what they want. Who are we to put guidlines on what they can or can't do on these sites that WE DON'T RUN.? So spare your feelings and talk about something that really matters. Please because it makes you look very shallow to try and set stipulations on a public social site. SMH ridiculously sad

Don't post your wedding pictures on Facebook?!
Don’t put “engaged” or “married” for relationship status?!
Life-long bonds of love throw people off and make them uncomfortable?!

What is the purpose of Facebook?
According to Facebook; "...helps you connect and share with the people in your life."
Apparently Christopher Schonberger hasn't noticed that we tend to share a lot things, from important to trivial, with the people in our lives. Most people tend to care about the people in their lives; even the trivial stuff.
Three things Christopher;
1. Facebook is not just for singles.
2. Life-long bonds of love are probably the most important events in most people's lives.
3. You are apparently an idiot.

Grow up, people! Is this all you really have to think about???????

I agree with JD. Updates every 10 minutes are annoying.

I think that since FB is such a "new" thing, people are just having fun with it. So what if people post that they are going to shower or take a crap. If it makes them feel connected to humanity that way or to their family or friends so be it. I think these social networks have literally saved many people from depression and loneliness. So for people to make judgment calls about a persons life, and whether they have one or not based on what their postings are, is ludicrous. I personally have a life. I have a family that I socialize with, as well as friends and I love to take pictures. My friends and my family are on FB and thru this medium we get to see each other's photos at family get togethers and functions, so its alot about sharing and staying connected. I think we need more things to bond us and allow us to connect to others, so we don't get too wrapped up in life and forget we have family, friends, former classmates and coworkers who we never get to see in person because of distance. Thanks to FB, we get to let them know that they have not been forgotten and that the memories we shared are still a part of our lives.

This was a stupid article. I mean, really? Don't post wedding pictures? Or let people know if you are engaged or married? FB is for connecting with people you know and if they want to see your wedding pictures, then so be it! Who is this person to let us know what THEY think are the Faux Pas of FB?? And, don't join FB after graduation? Come on. Who cares when you join??

Using the wall to burn someone? This shows your age. I am not saying use it for a conversation you don't want others to see, but there is nothing wrong with posting things on people's wall that you want to.

Also, who cares how many apps someone has on their FB? It's their FB, not yours. If you don't like it, BLOCK IT. Get a life.

The "author" of this blog is an idiot. I will give him that this was written in 2007, but wow! People who don't put their marital status as married when they are or engaged when they are look like they are hiding something. You sound like you are promoting extramarital affairs and well... stupidity. I do agree about some points, but NOT about posting marital status and wedding photos. You sound like a toxic bachelor......

Am I the only one who finds the comment section of this blog to be nearly satiracal in its irony? I would TOTALLY forward this link to FB, but now I'm in *Paranoid* status, due to my confusion over what may or may not be a faux pas.;P...Wait--are emoticons too juvenile? This could turn into a whole philosophical debate, but I graduated college so long ago, and all the partying I've done world-wide has kinda fried my brain. I have had a TON of fun, though! Hey, check me out tomorrow, I'll let ya know what hot spots I'm hittin' this weekend; it'll depend on whether me and the insignificant other are still fighting about that whole personal thing, ya know? Text me; don't wanna put intimate stuff right here in public, lol.

I totally agree with Jag, and I'm not even on FB. I'm just responding to this because I have time, being out of work at the moment. But who cares, right? Maybe Christopher Schonberger will understand more when he grows up.

If ANYONE'S post, whether it be every 10 minutes or 10 hours annoys you or you think is trivial and not worthy of your precious time to read it means 1) you aren't a good friend to them ( If it makes my friends happy to post every 10 min, who am I to say they can't? Go for it! ), 2) you get your panties in a wad waaaaaaay to easily ( unemployement, crime and hunger annoy ME - not how often someone posts) and 3) you are full of yourself. YOU ARE NOT THE FREAKING FB CRITIC!

FarceBook is just that a farce of childish stupidity and a tool for people to show just how self absorbed our society has digressed. Technology, is so badly flawed and so many jump on bandwagon of products which steal the essence of what I know and understand as being involved in life.
Each piece of technology you get in your grasp, takes a giant leap to giving up who you are and what you do in your private life. Today you can track a cell phone and the owner anywhere. Everything we post is monitored and scrutinized not just by our peers but our government who silently has adopted what may appear to be a literal phone tap, legally and without the user community having no say as to what that government does with this information.
Good luck to those who use these social networks, and believe they are clever and witty. The Joke is on us.

Here we have engaged in a rather new form of communication that may last for eternity... Just as we continue to try and understand the meanings of the first cave paintings, who's to say someone in the very far future may be found investing time trying to deciper the ramblings of a past society from information found on the remnants of a super server backup memory device...

Does anyone else just find the blog as amusing as I do? It was written @ four years ago by someone who obviously thinks a lot about their own opinion... How quaint some of their rambles are like "Facebook will soon drop the “is” from the status message feature" and number five, the "network" you belong to. Both of those are long forgotten (at the time Australia and the south pole were networks). I find it interesting that this is even "front page news" after all this time...

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